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Sunday, 11 May 2014

I WRITE FOR HER: HAVE YOU EVER YEARNED FOR DEATH?




Bismil Laahir Rahmaanir Raheem!

Assalaamu alaykum wa rahmatul Laahi wa barkaatuh brothers and sisters in Islam. Alhamdu lil Laah for everything that He puts in our way. 

So, recently, I see lots of facebook statuses talking about the death of one person or the other. Most of them young when you see their photos. In my vicinity too, I see and hear the same; so many people dying one after the other. 

Some few days ago, a man who had gone to help prepare his friend’s body for burial had suddenly collapsed in the room where the dead body was and then the next dawn, he died in the hospital. A woman came to express her condolence to the bereaved family and the next day, she also died. All these three people were in the same area.

So Allah, Al-Hayy, Al-Qayyum, tells us explicitly that;

‘Every soul will taste death, and you will only be given your [full] compensation on the Day of Resurrection. So he who is drawn away from the Fire and admitted to Paradise has attained [his desire]. And what is the life of this world except the enjoyment of delusion.’

Surah Al-‘Imraan, the Family of ‘Imraan, Chapter 3 ayah 185

And from the beginning of time, Allah azza wa jal has shown us a prove of this. At the end of the day, we all die. What I have come to realize is that one can never tell how death feels like until someone real close leaves. Then you understand what exactly it means to lose someone helplessly. And I say this out of experience. 

My Experience

I was kneeling by my dying dad in a hospital with my hands in his and on his stomach. I had never seen anyone die before but I could tell that it was close to the end for him. The pain was such that I cannot not describe. I only wished for one thing; that I could help make him well as he used to be. Then the ayah came running through my mind; How great Allah azza wa jal is! He says;

‘Then why do you not intervene when the soul of a dying person reaches the throat? And you at the moment are looking on. But We are nearer to him than you but you see not. Then why do you not if you are exempt from the reckoning and recompense bring back the soul to its body if you are truthful?’

Surah Al-Waqi’ah, the Event, Chapter 56 ayah 83-87

Lo and behold! It hit me hard how pitiful I was as a human being. The more reason that I should take advantage of now to worship him before I am suddenly put in the position I had seen my father in. May Allah azza wa jal engulf him with His abundant Rahma and all others. May Allah subhaanahu wa ta’aalaa grant them the best of His Jannah and all of us who will follow them as well. Aameen.

Grief of losing a loved one

We see how much grief the Prophet Muhammad suallal Laahu alayhi wa sallam felt when he lost his uncle, Abi Talib and then his beloved wife Khadija radiyal Laahu anhaa. That was the Prophet of Allah who understood the concept of death more than any human being. How much more us? I see the grief of Asmaa Hussein (check her out on facebook) in each letter in her status on facebook. A good Muslimah who lost her husband three years into their marriage. 

My friend’s latest yearning

Ok; a friend of mine tells me for some time now that she wishes to die and leave this Dunya that is full of fitaan (temptation, trials, affliction, distress, etc). Allah azza wa jal tells us of the beauty and serenity of what the afterlife contains for the one who dedicates his or her life to His true worship. My friend thinks about this afterlife which Allah subhaanahu wa ta’aalaa assures us that none of us could ever imagine its nature and then she feels like having that life instead of this one now.

That is quite interesting to me. Alhamdu lil Laah, we talked about it in detail and I was able to convince her on my thoughts. I felt the need to write this article afterwards for her and others who have this thinking to read and perhaps I might win them over with what I think.

Contemplating suicide

So, my friend’s situation reminded me of a Muslimah I had been introduced to by a Muslim brother of mine; a young wonderful lady who was contemplating suicide. The first time I heard, I shook all over. She had made quite a number of attempts and they all failed. Being a doctor, he tried to help her but to no avail so I became her friend. Her reasons for wanting to die were quiet sad. She had lost a very close friend and so mostly she felt like she was going to die to follow her due to how close they were. This made her extremely moody making it uncomfortable for her other friends and any other person to be around her. Soon she started thinking that no one wants to be around her so the feeling of suicide became a lot more intense. Alhamdu lil Laah! She is forgotten suicide now and enjoying her life to the maximum. Alhamdu lil Laah!

After this lady, I have come across a number of others who seem to contemplate suicide. I haven’t really come to terms with what the suicide lovers are expecting to have when they are finally out of this Dunya; are they expecting relieve and bliss? Or what?

Dr Muhammad A’rifi tells a story in his book; Enjoy Your Life (I recommend you to read that book). He tells the story of a young man who had sent him a message asking whether it was Islamically allowed for a Muslim to commit suicide. Being the person that the Sheikh is; he decided to call the person up. The moment the young man picked the Sheikh’s call, he wanted to know the answer and his tone of voice seemed like he was in distress over something. Dr A’rifi just told him that it is allowed to do so and the guy couldn’t believe it. He asked the Sheikh whether that was really true and he said yes and that he wanted to meet up with him so that they could discuss how he could go about the suicide.

That is how interesting it sometimes is. Mostly, these suicide thinkers do not want to really die. In the case of the young man above, he wanted to excuse himself from dying by finding out that Islam forbids it but the Sheikh decided to play a smart one on him. To understand the Sheikh’s strategy, you have to read the book. You wouldn’t regret it in shaa Allah.

I have ever thought of dying as well. Those days when my understanding of the essence of life was not as broad as it is now. I had wished to die due to some serious problems I was facing which I could not afford to share with anyone on earth for fear of causing pain to them. I had thought that if I died, then it will be over and then I could have some peace whiles I was with Allah (not to commit suicide, but die naturally). Interesting huh! And I thought of my parents; my mum especially and what my death will mean to her and I was hanging between two desires; life and death. Alhamdu lil Laah! Today, all that is over. Alhamdu lil Laah!

‘And no person can ever die except by Allah’s leave and at an appointed term. And whoever desires a reward in this world, We shall give him of it; and whoever desires reward in the Hereafter, We shall give him thereof. And We shall reward the grateful.’

Surah Al-Baqarah, the Cow, Chapter 2 ayah 145

My friend’s wish for death

As the ayah above states; one’s death does not depend on whether he or she wishes for it or not; it would not come if Allah has not decreed it and it will come if He decrees it. I remember once when I had gotten seriously sick as it usually happens to me and then my mum was almost going off; I prayed for life just because of my mum. By then I hoped that even if it was my time to go, Allah should spare me for my mum. Funny, isn’t it? And the last time I had gotten seriously sick again, a few years ago; my mum had finally come to terms with it that it was going to be the end but here I am. This affirms the fact that we could never tell when we were dying or not.

As I said above, my friend believes that the life of the Hereafter was better and she wanted to have that life now. Indeed, each one of us should wish to have the better life of the Hereafter than the one here. But does that mean that we should wish for death? No. Narrated Anas bin Malik: The Prophet suallal Laahu alayhi wa sallam said;

‘None of you should wish for death because of a calamity befalling him; but if he has to wish for death, he should say: ‘O Allah! Keep me alive as long as life is better for me, and let me die if death is better for me.’’ 

Sahih Al-Bukhari

So the Prophet warns us against the wish for death and he teaches us a proper way to go about it. 

The Hereafter is mind-blowingly sweet but...

How much confidence do you and I have about our Islam? Have we worshipped Allah, Ar-Raheem, enough to believe that we are good to go? Are we sure of Allah’s forgiveness for all of our sins? Are we sure that we would be blessed with the Rahma of Allah in order to obtain this pleasure which He describes to us? Narrated Jabir ibn Abdullah: Allah’s Messenger suallal Laahu alayhi wa sallam said; 

‘Do not wish for death, for the terror of the place whence one looks down is severe. It is part of a man’s happiness that his life should be long and Allah Who is Great and Glorious, should supply him with repentance.’

Al-Tirmidhi

We see that the issue of the Hereafter is not just the endless enjoyment part but it includes an endless pain as well. Each of us is either going to have the enjoyment part or the pain part. Now which one are you going to have? Do you know? Did Allah, Ar-Rahman, tell you which one you are getting? Obviously it is a no. So then, why the hurry to go into bliss? What if you went and it wasn’t the bliss you wanted but pain that is worse than the one from which you were running from in this life.

With the little I know of the seerah of the companions of the Prophet Suallal Laahu alayhi wa sallam, even though most of them were given the glad tidings of Paradise, they still strove with every inch of their lives to worship Allah azza wa jal with the least opportunity. And their desire for death was in such a way that they wanted so badly to die whiles Allah azza wa jal was pleased with them whether it was now or later.

So then why would we who have not been given the glad tidings of Jannah ever think of wishing for death now? It doesn’t make that much sense to me. As the Prophet suallal Laahu alayhi wa sallam advised us; if we were going to wish for death then we should rather say;

‘O Allah! Keep me alive as long as life is better for me, and let me die if death is better for me.’’

So why not put the burden of when to die aside since you have no say in it anyway and just really work hard so that Allah, Al-Gaffuur, may take you when your ihsaan reaches its peak? There is so much to do especially in our era. We cannot afford to run away from the fitaan which are there to test our faith in Allah, Al-Aziz, and our rewards increase with the increment of our level of resistance to these fitaan.

The Parable

Imagine that a man has lots of children around him in a very luxurious and comfortable house. One day, he sends these children away into a garden with a bowl to pick some fruits. He lets them know that he would call each one of them back and give them something special based on the passion with which they pick the fruits. The children are then put in the uncomfortable garden with dark soil, thorns and insects. Then some of them begin to get distressed with the farm and their objective for being in that farm and they want to go back even though the man had not called them yet meanwhile they do not know how much longer he was going to make them stay there. Others however take their time to deal with the uncomfortable situation and try hard not to make those things in the farm that will have a negative impact on their passion to pick the fruits to get in their way. They do so knowing very well that if they tried hard to be very passionate about doing the man this service, they were soon going to get something better in return even though they had no idea how soon. They don’t know exactly when but that isn’t their problem. Their problem is their mood at all points in time.

I believe you have gotten what I am driving at? It is the same thing I see with us. We have a purpose in life. It is better we concentrate on this purpose and strive as much as we can with Allah’s help to fight all the temptations, trials, distress, etc that Allah azza wa jal puts in our way in order to test our faith. Not forgetting the fact that, we will soon go to give accounts to Him.

There is also the fear of dying which isn’t also healthy. Some people fear dying but they do not concentrate on trying their best to please Allah due to this fear. This would not help at all. It is not a wise thing to do. Fear the state in which you die rather than your death.

I pray I have been able to say something useful to you. So instead of putting yourself in the distress of wishing for death which you might not get if it isn’t your time, why don’t you do du’a that the Prophet suallal Laahu alayhi wa sallam taught us and just live our lives with hope that Allah, Ar-Razzak, answers?

That was long and I am grateful to you for taking time to read this. You can contact me about any concerns in shaa Allah. May Allah azza wa jal take us when we finally obtain ihsaan and when that ihsaan is at its highest peak. Aameen. Remember always that I love you for the sake of Allah and may He be a witness to this love and may He love us even more. Aameen

Jazaakumul Laahu khair!
Islam Forever In shaa Allah!
Assalaamu alaykum wa rahmatul Laah!
Rubaba Mmahajia Rahma Sabtiu

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